Thursday, April 25, 2013

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Pete's Sun Run blog post

If you haven't read it yet, check out Pete's Sun Run blog post for Still Life Canada here.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Vancouver Sun Run 2013

It was a day of mixed weather and mixed emotions. We were inspired by our love for Toren. He was very present for us and we wanted to channel that energy towards raising awareness and funds to support families of stillborn babies. Not everybody at the run was ok with that. Maybe some part of me expected it, but I will never, ever get used to it. I had to take my shirt off for a short while because I became afraid, in a way, of people's ignorance. I didn't feel I could face it alone. And then I remembered - I am never alone. With that thought, and thanks to my dear friend, herself a bereaved aunt, I was able to put the shirt back on and hopefully it will help someone. I'm so grateful for continuing support, mainly from families carrying their own burden of grief. As a team, we went to so much effort to prepare for the race, put together a plan, coordinate and decorate our shirts, and solicit pledges, on top of all the work being done for the conference, that I couldn't let one ignorant person deter us.

Our daughter had a great time at the Mini Sun Run. I had no idea what she would make of 2.5K but she walked along happily with her little friend (and occasionally ran and dragged us moms behind like luggage (no wheels)!), oblivious to the cool weather and frozen attitudes. Our walk only lasted about 40 minutes so we hung out around the neighbourhood with our friends until it was time to cheer on Peter and the rest of the Still Life Canada team members as they neared the end of the course. It was the best feeling cheering on friends as they approached the finish line, especially knowing some of the experiences they had all been through to get to this point. Some were running, some were walking and some were pushing empty strollers with pictures of their babies. As they crossed the finish line, each one doubled back to meet us and when the final team members approached, we all joined them and crossed the finish line together (-ish!). It was a fun, amazing, beautiful experience. Pete did great on his first 10K. He finished in 1:01:29 and is feeling pretty good today physically. He posted on fb last night that he has "sore legs and an aching heart".

The tragic events at the Boston Marathon were never far from my mind all day yesterday. I woke up once in the night feeling fearful about bringing my child to the finish line to wait for her Daddy. Many participants were wearing blue and yellow, Boston's colours, so we were able to keep those families in our hearts but somehow forget about the fear. The magic of love.

Big thank you to everyone who donated. I haven't heard yet how much money we were able to raise but whatever the amount, we are very grateful. If you didn't get a chance to contribute but would like to, follow this link to the SLC site.

Pete's shirt on the left, mine on the right, and Toren's big sister's on the bottom

Wading through the crowd to reach our friends before the start of the kids Mini Sun Run

The kids finish line! No rush or anything.

Perfecting those bobsledding skills

Our family

Friday, April 19, 2013

Getting Ready for the Sun Run

The Vancouver Sun Run will donate $10 from every late entry for Sunday's race to help victims of the bombings at the Boston Marathon.

They are also collecting shoes to be cleaned up and distributed to those in need. A cause after our own hearts.

Please help us raise money and awareness to support families affected by stillbirth.

Painting her tshirt. She is almost ready!


Chatting to hairdresser about our kids, trying to be 'normal':

Me: "We have stickers, bits of paper, ribbon, beads, all kinds of things all over our floors."

Her: "At least you don't have little cars everywhere."

Me: [stunned silence]

This is why I tend to not make small talk with people for too long anymore. In the hairdressing chair, I'm a captive audience.

Full Moon Silhouettes

Beautiful real-time video of the moon rising. Thank you, Dr Jo, for sharing. ♥

For more information on how this gorgeous video was made, go to:
Full Moon Silhouettes from Mark Gee on Vimeo.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Pancake Lessons

Yesterday I woke up under the wrong side of the bed and posted on fb: "Major grief anger this morning. I channelled it into making pancakes. The pancakes are made with love but I didn't have to turn the stove on. See? Grief isn't all bad."

We had some pancakes left over so this morning while our daughter was eating them she suddenly said, "Mama, I'm so proud of you."

Me: "Really? I'm so glad. Any reason in particular, or just in general?"

Her: "Because you just tried to have Toren. Do you understand what I mean? It's too hard to explain."

Me: "...yes, I think I understand."

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Being A Jerk

There's a woman in our neighbourhood I used to chat to and I hadn't seen her for a long time but lately I have been bumping into her everywhere. I keep trying to avoid her but it seems like the harder I try, the more I see her. She has a little girl my daughter's age and twin boys. Twin boys. Nice lady. I don't want to have anything to do with her.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Vancouver Sun Run 2013

Our daughter will be "running" in the Vancouver 2013 2.5K Mini Sun Run this weekend! This is part of fundraising for Still Life Canada's conference, You Are Not Alone: Bringing Stillbirth Out Of The Shadows, happening this summer. Please support us by sharing this far & wide. So many of you have donated already over the last year and three months since Toren was born, let's invite others to contribute. We are so grateful for all the ways you have continued to support us as we help Toren make an impact on the world. Peter will also be running in the Sun Run and I know he would appreciate anything you can contribute to help motivate him for his HOLY SH** FIRST EVER 10K!

To donate, please go to SLC's Contribute page. Thanks for any way you can contribute to this event being a success!

Thursday, April 04, 2013

Words of Love

"There is not a breathing of the common wind that will forget thee"
~ William Wordsworth

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Good Combination

I could use a bit more caramel, a little bit less of the other thing.